In which I love running

No... the above statement is a lie. a LIE I say! In reality I hate running and it MAKES ME WANT TO DIE A LITTLE.

What I LOVE.. is that I now have the choice to run. Pre-surgery I couldn't run, I had shin splints, tendonitus and within five minutes of running or walking anywhere too fast - my legs were screaming in pain. I think deep down I knew it was weight related - but I didn't really think I was that fat I guess.

Oh how wrong I was.

Today was a beautiful day out, the sun was shining and it was warm for the first time in a long time. And I just casually thought to myself 'hmmm I should go for a run.' So, texting my good friend Mikey (who similarly to me has lost a lot of weight in the past, so I trust him to see me huffing and puffing away looking nasty) we arranged to meet up.

Instantly I was regretting it. WHAT was I thinking? Running with Mikey could only lead to humiliation, sore legs, and slinking off in defeat, I knew it.

So we met at the pre-arranged spot and I'm nervous, sure I'm about to fail at it. We start at a gentle pace... I'm thinking to myself that it's not so bad. then BAM - oh jesus I'm puffing and huffing, lugging my ass down this track which Mikey assures me is a 'gentle' 3k track. These words do not compute, how can a 3k run be gentle? A 3k run sounds brutal!

But you know what? I did it! I didn't run the whole way admittedly, there were some walking moments - but Mikey tells me he thinks I ran about 2k out of the 3k all up. I know that to him I was puffing and unfit and it was terrible, but actually I was pretty damn proud of myself. Before I would have given up and walked most if not all of it, but not anymore!

And you know what, my legs didn't hurt a bit.

It's amazing how FREEING it is. I can do these things if I want to now without hurting myself because of the strain on my body. I'm actually starting to feel somewhat normal, like someone who can look at herself in the mirror and not hate what she sees. Like someone who can run!